Friday, November 23rd and Saturday, November 24th (Post Thanksgiving Stress Days - PTSD)

Regardless of your religious affiliation, Thanksgiving is one of those uniquely American holidays where families are united (whether they want to be or not). Combine that with the capitalistic retail and grocery sales markets and you have one volatile powder keg waiting for just one little old lady, grabbing that last can of cranberry sauce at the market , to explode.  Offering relief from those unwanted freeloading guests, and the tumultuousness of a Black Friday shopping expedition, The Bit Players provided the steam release valve with laughter at their comedy exploits for this pressure-cooker weekend.

Friday night’s cast of characters included Clayon McFarlane, Jessica Bradley, Matt Lindman, Stephanie Conrad, Lobo Linhares, hosted by Frank Fusaro, with musical accompaniment by Devon Mello.

The holiday’s overindulgences now over, the show began with “One Word Story”.  In this bit the players must tell a story one word at a time.    In Friday night’s story-telling we hear about Michel Obama’s candy obsession.  However Michel being the nurturing woman that she is turned to the more healthful alternative of corn nuts.  Michel was approached by Barrack who admonished Michel for giving the children this substitute for candy.  Michel was not swayed by Barrack, telling him that the children need protein.



Clayon McFarlane, Lobo Linhares, and Frank Fusaro
in "Good Cop / Bad Cop"



In “Good Cop / Bad Cop” Lobo took on the perpetrator role and the cops were played by Frank and Clayon. In this bit, the cops provide the necessary clues for Lobo to figure out his crime to which he must confess.  The audience provided the suggestions for the crime of killing Walt Disney with an Etch-A-Sketch in the Fortress of Solitude.  The audience reveled in the tortuous interrogation by Clayon and Frank, and laughed uproariously as Frank even entertained a little police brutality, shaking Lobo as he would an Etch-A-Sketch.

Lobo Linhares, Stephanie Conrad,
Frank Fusaro, and Matt Lindman in
"Irish Drinking Song"

“Irish Drinking Song” is a musical bit where the audience provides a name and an occupation.  Frank, Matt, Stephanie and Lobo then had the task of composing an improvised song in limerick fashion about Johnny the Pilot.  Unfortunately, Johnny was not the best of aviators and crashed his plane.

The Bit Players perform "Love Song"

Bringing a little love to the theater, the Bit Players performed another musical bit “Love Song” in which they profess their love of a famous person. The audience suggestion of Jimmy Fallon was challenging for some of the players who, like the baby in the Capital One commercial, found it difficult to give Jimmy a little love.

“Bartender” rounded out the first set with Frank and Jessica behind the bar providing musical advice to their patrons.  The patrons came to their bar seeking their advice for their quirky problems provided to them by the audience.  An inebriated Stephanie forgot her underwear, Lobo had stuffing in his locker. Clayon suffered from memory loss and Matt dealt with tardiness.

Jessica Bradley and Frank Fusaro as "Bartenders" and Lobo Linhares, Matt Lindman, and Clayon McFarlane as patrons

Clayon McFarlane and Matt Lindman
in "That Sounds Like A Song"

In the second set of Friday’s show Stephanie, Matt and Clayon took on “That Sounds Like A Song” where we once again find ourselves in the Whitehouse with Barrack Obama (played by Stephanie – Now, I bet you thought that the Presidential character would be played by the only black man in the group.  Ha! But….. No!!!).  Who knew that President Obama did not like jelly donuts and underhandedly was using his secret service agent. But fear not, Clayon helps Matt over his donut betrayal and our two agents find love?  (or was it lust?) The scene ended with Matt and Clayon’s grinding/ bumping sexy dance to the incredulity riotous laughter of the audience.

The Drakes are "Serenaded" by The Bit Players

Eddie and Sarah Drake celebrating their 5^th wedding anniversary were surprised as they were called to the stage to be “Serenaded”.  Eddie the younger of the couple met Sarah at Mansfield High School. The two went to separate colleges, Eddie to Babson to get his business degree , now working in marketing and Sarah to UNH for her degree in teaching.  Sarah is a stay-at-home mom (The hardest of all jobs) raising their two girls, Kaylen and Juilianne .  The couple’s hobby is drinking wine and what better place to do that and celebrate than at the Firehouse Theater?  All of the information gleaned in interview by Frank was fodder for an improvised song sung by the entire cast in honor of the Drake’s special occasion.

With the tryptophan completely out of their systems, the Bits took out all the stops on Saturday night.  Joining Frank and Clayon on stage were Vlad Tenenbaum, Neal Leaheey, Pat Dugan, and Tim Bric who performed to a packed house.  Also joining musical genius, Devon this night in the Bit Players House Band,(the saucer to Devon’s cup, the Lois to his Clark, the tinsel to his tree), Chase Ceglie.

The Bit Players perform "Party Quirks"

In “Party Quirks” Neal hosted an office party which was attended by his office mates all having unique quirks.  With Neal out of the room these quirks were provided by the audience; Tim was a peacock, Vlad was a blender, and Clayon was re-living Beauty & the Beast.  Neal guessed the eccentricities of his co-workers through their actions and dialog.



Pat Dugan with Vlad Tenenbaum
and Frank Fusaro in "Bartender"



“Bartender” was up fourth in the lineup for Saturday night.  Frank and Vlad manned the bar and Clayon and Pat were the patrons.  Watch the video to see what problems with which our patrons come to the bar seeking advice, and hear the advice of the bartenders sung in response. (Click here to watch this amazing video - > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqi9ihO05xs&list=UUCKEgOdfeBioc_vDbVYZv_A&index=1&feature=plcp  )



Clayon McFarlane with Vlad Tenenbaum
and Frank Fusaro in "Bartender"



Up next, Frank and Tim were “Sportcasters”  for  Dishbowl 2012, an Olympic event which found our athletes, Vlad (aka Priscilla Epcot) and Clayon (aka Ronnie Smith)  competing for the championship in this mimed piece of dishwashing zaniness.



The first set concluded with a “Telethon” about Ex-Boy/Girl friends.  Hosted by Vlad, the players form the entertainment for this fictitious telethon, to entice the viewers to call in to donate for the cause.  Neal and Pat were first up, and formed a “Grunge Duet” called The Bitch-Club .  Clayon boogied out with Disco, and Frank and Tim (aka Shugah & Spice) jammed out to Hip Hop stylings.

Pat Dugan and Neal Leaheey
perform in "Telethon"

After warming up with an “Improv Line” in the second set, the Bits performed “Stunt Doubles”.  In this bit Frank and Pat, the pretentious actors that they are, call for their stunt doubles (Vlad and Neal) to act out their most menial movements.  In this scene, Frank and Pat are detectives who call for their doubles to roll over the dead woman, remove the knife, and roll her up in a shower curtain.  The audience couldn’t stop laughing at the antics of Neal and Vlad who “expanded” on the action with a few wacky twists.



Clayon McFarlane and Vlad Tenenbaum
in "Sportscasters"



In the audience and celebrating his 30^th Birthday was Jeff who was brought up to be “Serenaded”.  Like Clayon, in Friday night’s “Dating Game” our birthday boy Jeff, could also be considered “The Most Interesting Guy in the world” with his varied interests.  Not only is Jeff a Project Manager he also arranges yoga retreats for people, sending them to places like Thailand and Peru.  Additionally, Jeff runs a composting operation for a local farm community.  Our “green” guest, Jeff fittingly was accompanied by his nutritionist partner, Jill.  As usual the Bit Players composed an improvised song in his honor.



Jeff is "Serenaded" by Frank Fusaro and The Bit Players



Mime extraordinaire, Vlad took the stage next in a mime piece called “Good Morning”.  In this bit Vlad took suggestions from the audience on items they might encounter during their morning routines.  Vlad then not only mimed using the items, he also brought the items themselves to life to the amazement and pleasure of the crowd.



The love kept flowing as the next bit in the set was “The Dating Game” hosted by Pat.  In this bit our bachelorette seeking love (Neal) was sent out of the room, as our eligible bachelors Frank, Clayon, and Tim received their unique traits from the audience.  Tim was obsessed with Ke$ha, Clayon had animal terrets, and Frank stuck in a Full House episode.  When Neal returned to the room, he deduced the identities of his potential dates through their answers to his questions.  Neal eventually selected Frank and his love of Danny Tanner as his love interest.



The Bit Players perform
"The Dating Game"



The Bit Players ended Saturday night’s show with a “Blues Song” from the topical audience suggestion of Black Friday…  The energetic show ended with the audience singing along and clapping to this closing song’s chorus of “we’ve got the low-down dirty Black Friday Blues”…

From Birthdays, Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties, Anniversaries and even marriage proposals, want to arrange a unique event for someone special?  Why not show your love or appreciation for that certain someone, LIVE onstage!  Bring your friend or loved one to the Bit Players show, and celebrate in a one-of-a-kind way.  Contact the theater for information on how we can help you plan and make your event special!

The Bit Players perform improv comedy every Friday and Saturday night at 8:00pm at the Firehouse Theatre, 4 Equality Park Place (off Broadway), Newport, RI 02840.  Please call the box office for reservations and information about all of the shows   401-849-FIRE (3473)  And it is always BYOB!



Friday, November 2nd and Saturday, November 3rd

With the aftermath of Super-Storm Sandy and with elections being held this week, where serious and critical matters are at the forefront of our thoughts, what better remedy from the weight of these somber issues plaguing our minds than to laugh at the frivolous antics of the Bit Players and escape reality for a little while?

The low pressure system surrounding the barometer of Friday night’s crowd quickly rose as The Bit Players gained speed and took the stage by storm. Our Bit Players storm chasers for Friday were Frank Fusaro, Neal Leaheey, Patrick Duggan, Vlad Tenenbaum, under the watchful eye of host, Matt Lindman.

Matt Lindman, Patrick Duggan, Neal Leaheey and
Frank Fusaro in "Story, Story, Die!" hosted by Vlad Tenenbaum

The thunder clouds were forming in a bit called “Story, Story, Die!”  In this bit, all of the players were called to the stage to tell a collective story.  Directed by Frank, a player spoke when pointed to.  Frank conducted the story with his finger.  Where one player left off in the story, the next player continued.  If not, that player met his end, and died a painful death at the hands of Frank.  The audience provided the inspiration for the story of Jackie and her needle in prison.  In Jackie’s attempt to break free of her prison confines by stabbing all of the prison guard with her needle, she meets Morgan Freeman who doesn’t want to help her escape because he is still waiting for Andy .  There is no “Redemption”  in this story!

Neal Leaheey, Patrick Duggan, and
Frank Fusaro perform "Doo Run"

Audience members, mother Grace and her daughter Christina the finance counselor were pleasantly surprised by Neal, Patrick, and Frank who performed a “Doo Run” song for them.  In the improvised song, the players used the adjectives provided as Christina described her mother has fantastic and beautiful, and Grace described Christina as loving and awesome.

Matt Lindman and Vlad Tenenbaum
in "Location, Career, Death!"

In the next bit, Matt and Vlad took on “Location, Career, Death!”  In this bit with Matt out of the room, Vlad received suggestions from the audience of a location (the womb), an occupation (Veterinarian),  and an object ( an onion).  The twist in this bit was that Vlad could not speak and conveyed all of the suggestions to Matt only through the use of mime.  When Matt thought he understands each item he clapped, and Vlad moved on to the next.  On the final object, when Matt understood what it was, he “killed” Vlad with it.  In the end we found out just how good our players could “talk” with their bodies.

Much like in the hit TV show “Survivor” players were voted off the “island”.  But in this Bit Player’s version, the audience voted off the player that they no longer wanted to see in the scene with the remaining players having to pick up the void left by the player(s) voted out.  The setting for the scene was a High School Dance.  The audience witnessed Neal’s well-endowed flirtations, Frank’s bothersome chaperone, Patrick’s juvenile drinker, and  Vlad’s lovable disco dancing character.  In the end, Vlad was the sole-Survivor!  (Watch the video to see Vlad take on ALL of the roles himself –

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gyJ_qG6Qf6U&feature=youtu.be 

 

Neal Leaheey and Frank Fusaro as "Bartenders" with Vlad Tenenbaum, Patrick Duggan and Matt Lindman as patrons.

 Frank and Neal took up residence behind the bar in The Bit Player’s signature piece, “Bartender”.  In this bit, players come to the bar with unique problems given to them by the audience.  But the players don’t just  tell the bartenders their problems.  That would be too easy!  They sing them.  Being dutiful bartenders, Frank and Neal provide advice back to their wayward patrons also in song.  Tonight, Vlad’s problem was that he had “Powerballs” and no one would compete with him, Patrick had been rejected from his colleges of choice, and Matt “ took Jobs offshore”. 

Poppy is "Serenaded" by The Bit Players

Long-time Bit Players fan, Poppy, from Jack Wills group,  was called to the stage to be “Serenaded”  for her Birthday. 

Neal Leaheey and Matt Lindman as "Puppets"
with audience members Heather and Jake

Audience members, Heather and Jake got a chance to participate in the show as they were called to the stage to assist as puppeteers in a bit called “Puppets”. Heather and Jake put Neal and Matt through their paces, bending and moving them at will in a scene about Yoga Instructors.

The Bit Players finished the night appropriately with a “Blues Song” about the audience suggested topic of,  "The Hurricane Prep Blues”

Unlike Friday’s assembly, without an empty seat in the house, the Saturday night crowd did not need any force or fuel to increase pressure.  They were fired up, running on full throttle, and ready to explode (especially the eleven young IMP-provisers looking on with approval from the “catwalk” along the left wall of the theater.)

For Saturday’s show Frank took over the hosting duties, and Matt was joined by fellow Bit Players, Jim Foley, Stephanie Conrad, Clayon McFarlane, and Dylan Eberle.

Dylan Eberle and Frank Fusaro as cops,with
Clayon McFarlane as the perp in "Good Cop / Bad Cop"

In “Good Cop / Bad Cop”,   Frank and Dylan played the cops with Clayon as the perpetrator in this bit.  With Clayon out of the room, the audience provided suggestions for a crime committed by our congenial criminal.  Frank and Dylan provided clues to Clayon in order for him to confess to killing Judge Judy with a TaeBo DVD in Middle earth.

Stephanie Conrad and Matt Lindman are joined by
Dylan Eberle and Jim Foley in "Genres"

In the bit, “Genres”, Stephanie and Matt were actors in a scene about mid-wives.    Directed by Frank, the scene continued in the reality established, but was changed by the Director to audience the suggested genres.  In Film Noire the actors provide a dark soliloquy introducing the Dolans a couple popping out babies (played by Jim and Dylan) In Sci-Fi Matt attempts to deliver Dylan’s alien baby. Moving to Western, Dylan’s baby was coming out of the womb bearing a six-shooter drawn. In Game of Thrones, several mythical characters from the land of Westeros fought and postured.  As the scene changed to “Bad Boys II”, Jim commented “Looks like this shit just got real!”  And finally as a Musical, the two mid-wives prevent the erstwhile couple from having any more babies, and finished up with a chorus of “You’re All Tied Up!”

The Bit Players sing a "Doo Wop" song

In the musical bit “Doo Wop” the entire cast professed their love for a night light, with Jim, Stephanie, and Frank, taking solos.  But it was Dylan who brought the song home, discarding his nightlight in the finale chorus , no longer needing his nightlight because, “ I Grew the*&^% up!”

The Bit Players "Serenade" audience member Nicki

30 year old Birthday Girl, Nicki, from Queens, NY was brought to the stage to be “Serenaded”  by The Bit Players.  Nicki, who works for city of NY in Homeless Services, was out celebrating her day with her friends with benefits, companion, and Boston restaurant owner, Monit.

Vlad Tenenbaum and Matt Lindman in "Sportscasters"

“Sportscasters” was up next in the rotation.  In this bit, Frank and Dylan acted as announcers for a fictitious Olympic style sporting event.   Fellow Bit, Vlad came on stage to join Matt and competed as athletes in “Trash Bag 2012”.  In the scene about taking out the trash, our athletes, Raul Rodriguez (Matt) working his way up through the Hefty Division,  battled  Waste Management boss, Tony (Vlad) from Long Island.  Watch this video to witness the hilarity that ensued –

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEw8bFPbTqU&feature=youtu.be

The Bit Players perform "Telethon"

The last bit of the night was “Telethon” .  In this fabricated fundraiser for Butchers, the viewers are provided with “entertainment” for the telethon to encourage them to call in with donations.  Hosted by Vlad,   Clayon took musical genre of R&B.   Jim and Stephanie performed a Hall & Oates duet.  The finale entertainment included the trio of Matt (Tenacious-D), Frank (Vanilla Ice), and Dylan (The Cranberries) who sang in a “We are the World” overture joined by the entire cast to end the night.

From Birthdays, Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties, Anniversaries and even marriage proposals, want to arrange a unique event for someone special?  Why not show your love or appreciation for that certain someone, LIVE onstage!  Bring your friend or loved one to the Bit Players show, and celebrate in a one-of-a-kind way.  Contact the theater for information on how we can help you plan and make your event special!

The Bit Players perform improv comedy every Friday and Saturday night at 8:00pm at the Firehouse Theatre, 4 Equality Park Place (off Broadway), Newport, RI 02840.  Please call the box office for reservations and information about all of the shows   401-849-FIRE (3473)  And it is always BYOB!

Wednesday, October 31, 2012 (Hilarious Haunted Halloween Hijinks)

In the spirit of Halloween, the Bit Players pulled out all the stops.  Check out this video and watch as the Bit Players “morph” into their alter-spooky-egos (Click the link here -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9mpxaKCrKI&feature=plcp )

The nearly capacity crowd for the special Halloween Bit Players Show was decked out in the craziest, zaniest, spookiest costumes, and their energy was running on high octane (or that may have been from the sugar rush they were experiencing with all of the candy they were given /sometimes pelted with by The Bit Players), including our Hurricane Sandy refugee students from NYU.   Having received their treats, the audience was primed and ready for some improv comedy tricks! 

Performing tonight, and also donning costumes were host, Frank Fusaro, dressed as a fisherman (to compliment his girl, Lindsey’s beautiful mermaid), Vlad Tenenbaum was dressed as a Russian Army Officer, Dylan Eberle was impersonating John Lennon, Clayon McFarlane was clothed as a zombie skeleton, Stephanie Conrad sported a zebra costume (who is dating a clown – fellow Bit Player Matt),  and Jim Foley imitated the life of a hipster(who apparently has a penchant for creepy dolls – his girlfriend Jess) .

Other Bit Players who greeted guests, handed out treats, and were tonight’s costume judges, were Neal Leaheey masquerading as a victim of a Slasher /Zombie Apocalypse film(appropriately matching his gal, Zombie woman, Lisa)  Lobo Linhares dressed as “The Doctor”, Jessica Bradley, as a funky  princess with vertical stripe issues, and behind the scenes in the production booth, Patrick Duggan as a SIM.

The Bit Players perform "Ghost Story, Die!"

The show started off with “Ghost Story Die”.  In this bit the players tell a collective story, but are at the mercy of Vlad’s fickle finger.  When Vlad is pointing at a player they must continue the story. If at any moment the player falters, Vlad can “Kill them off”.  With the audience suggestions of Mitt with his binder on Jupiter , the Bit Players delighted the audience with their own version of a certain politician’s latest gaffe, “Binders Full of Women”.

“Haunted House” was up next. In this bit one of the players (Stephanie) has inherited a mansion. However, in order obtain her inheritance Stephanie learns from the butler (played by Vlad) that she must stay one night in the house with its ghostly inhabitants.  Suggestions for ghosts provided by the audience were Dylan as the ghost of Moses, Jim as the ghost of Paul Giamatti, and Clayon as the ghost of LL Cool J.  Stephanie must guest the identity of each of the ghosts during her night in the haunted house.  Watch the hysterics that take place along the way:  (Click the link to watch –> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10Cc24DxFOo&feature=plcp )

Frank Fusaro, Clayon McFarlane, Jim Foley,
and Dylan Eberle perform "Irish Drinking Song"

“Irish Drinking Song” is a musical game sung in an Irish limerick style.  In this bit, the audience provided the suggestions of a name and occupation (Jerry the Garbage man).  Frank, Jim, Dylan, and Clayon delighted the crowd by improvising a song about Jerry and his odd date in his garbage truck; that was until the police showed up, and broke up Jerry’s night of passion.

The Musical bit, “Doo Wop” song featured Jim Stephanie, Frank and Dylan.  In this bit the audience suggested the topic of the Jack O’Lantern.  Watch as the Bit Players create an improvised song all about this Halloween inspired theme.  (Click here to watch the video -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym8f-Lnsh0E&feature=plcp  )

The Bit Players perform "Chainsaw Massacre" - Yes, this is The Shake Weight!

A bit that was retrieved from the dusty confines of the Bit Players attic, “Chainsaw Massacre” was thrown in the rotation.  Similar to the childhood game, “Broken Telephone” each player must relay information to the next as they came into the room, but only through the use of mime.  The audience suggestions of “A Presidential Debate” for the location, an occupation of a Bus Driver, and the Shake Weight as the object were all fodder for some hilarious improvised mime sketches.  The crowds particularly loved the mimed exchanges for the Shake Weight.

The Bit Players in "Telethon"

“Telethon” is another musical bit where the players hold a fictional fundraiser for a cause.  Hosted by Vlad, tonight’s cause was “Super Heroes” .  To entice the viewers to call in and pledge money, the entertainment for the evening had Stephanie wailing “Country”, Clayon resonating with “Reggae” and the trio of Jim, Dylan, and Frank crooning, grunting, and groaning to the styles of Michael Bolton, Death Metal, and Louis Armstrong.

The audience was thrilled that the hour long show ran well over its allotted time, as they like the Bit Players were having so much fun they didn’t want it to end.  But, alas…  all good things must come to an end, and the Bit Players suitably ended the night with a “Blues Song”  all about Halloween.

Our Audience recieves prizes for their costumes!

After the show, the Bit Players awarded some amazing prizes for our spectacular costume contest.  A BIG Thank You to Corner Cafe, Salvation Cafe, The Fifth Element, Ben's Chili Dogs, THE FASTNET PUB, Pour Judgement, Malt on Broadway, and of course, our friends at Jack Wills Newport for their generosity!  AND Thanks to our audience for being great sports and coming out to the Firehouse Theater in full costume regalia.  There were so many awesome costumes, and it was difficult to judge winners.

From Birthdays, Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties, Anniversaries and even marriage proposals, want to arrange a unique event for someone special?  Why not show your love or appreciation for that certain someone, LIVE onstage!  Bring your friend or loved one to the Bit Players show, and celebrate in a one-of-a-kind way.  Contact the theater for information on how we can help you plan and make your event special!

The Bit Players perform improv comedy every Friday and Saturday night at 8:00pm at the Firehouse Theatre, 4 Equality Park Place (off Broadway), Newport, RI 02840.  Please call the box office for reservations and information about all of the shows   401-849-FIRE (3473)  And it is always BYOB!